I don't buy the "planning doesn't come naturally to me" faux excuse. Sounds suspiciously passive-aggressive to me. As in, I want my children in here because I think it's a splendid idea, so, hum, let me conveniently forget to plan a safe harbor for them. Safe harbor, i.e., where they could wait in excited anticipation and be given the gift of a happy reunion with their new baby brother.
No, instead they feel frightened and devalued. The moment considerably diminished, if not ruined.
I don't agree with the "childbirth is natural" line, either. Sex is natural, but not for a child. Neither is watching others have sex. Childbirth and sex are both beautiful conditions for mature adults. Not children who are too young, too developmentally immature, too emotionally ill-equipped to understand and process these events. Their young brains are simply not ready.
Consider this: There are many sexual perpetrators who ask the child for consent under the delusion that a child is developmentally mature enough to give consent. Children are not. We have laws in this country which dictate that minor children cannot give consent. Not even sixteen year olds can give consent. Laws devised under the guidance of child development experts who hold post graduate degrees from esteemed universities. Asking "consent" is clearly not appropriate and especially at such a young age. And yet, this mother thinks her seven year old can give consent? Her three year old?
We as adults, as parents, are assigned the profound task of making judgement calls designed to protect and nuture our children. This is our job. Not to make them a witness to our own magical but terrifying hour.
An hour that could result in tragedy. Ever take a walk through an old cemetery and see how many young mothers' headstones you see?
So I don't care or respect that the children were "asked." It matters not one wit. That the children clearly and repeatedly said no? Does matter. As in, hey super mom, you were given a get out of jail free card but you ripped it up.
What also matters is that these parents and grandparents and any other adult present, partook in what amounts to group neglect of two young children's emotional limits.