Saturday, December 25, 2010

what I did not manage to accomplish for Christmas

Christmas cut out sugar cookies.

Chocolate chip cookies with red & green M&Ms.

Raspberry thumb print cookies.

Pot of gumbo.

Fresh cranberry garland for the Christmas tree.

Cranberry bread.

What I did manage to accomplish:

Two days on the couch with a heating pad under my neck.

My neck seized while I was engaged in the complicated arm pretzel yoga pose known as "brushing hair into a downward bun." Crick in the neck sounds deceptively minor, doesn't it?

The other thing I accomplished, which was quite wonderful, was to curl up on the playroom pull out couch with my twin-daughters-as-book-ends watching Brittany Murphy in Love and Other Disasters. Cute, cute, cute movie.

Also? My daughters taught me how to watch my Netflix instant queue on the big screen TV via the Wii. Now there are three words I hadn't heard of back when my girlies were born.

Hope you are all enjoying a very Merry, very restful and very pain free Christmas day!

Friday, December 24, 2010

magical memories of christmas eve

Sneaking out of bed on Christmas eve, sliding behind the living room sofa, hiding and waiting to see Santa come down the chimney. Lucky for me I was lying on a hardwood floor beneath a window with a down draft. I climbed back in bed to get warm and fell asleep. Santa was safe for another few years.

Watching my aunt, who was visiting from the south, make footprints out of fireplace ash so that my younger brother and sister would see proof that Santa had come down the chimney. I loved the almost grown up feeling of being behind the curtain. And I loved my aunt and my grandmother. I was so glad they came to spend the holidays with us.

My brothers and I begging and begging our mom to let us open just one present, please, please, please and her finally giving in. Testing each present, trying to decide which one would be the most fun.

Driving home from midnight mass. We lived in the country and passed miles of flat fields and farmland. We were listening to the radio and heard the announcer say that Santa was officially in flight. I remember looking out of the car window, up at the dark sky, hoping to catch a glimpse. I saw a shooting star. I just knew that was a spark from Santa's sleigh.

How about you, readers? What are your magical holiday memories?

Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays and a wonderful New Year.

Wednesday, December 08, 2010

the diagnosis is in

The evaluation is complete. The tests interpreted. The diagnosis is in.

The One Hundred Twelfth United States Congress suffers from TCTDDD (Tax Cut Trickle Down Delusional Disorder).

Haldol, anyone?

"Yes! Extending the existing tax cuts will create jobs. Because the only way out of this mess is to keep things exactly as they are." -Stephen Colbert

p.s. Great minds think alike.

Wednesday, December 01, 2010

empty lip balm appreciation day

I'm one of those people who needs to join Lip Balm Anonymous. I keep a tube of lip balm (or three) in my car, a tube (or two) in my purse, a tube in my desk, a tube in my jeans pocket, and an ever-changing number of tubes in my kitchen medicine cabinet depending on how many of my kids nab one as they leave for school.

The tube in car door well is nearly empty. Or empty to the point where I can no longer swipe my lips across the top and get comfortably balmed. Instead I have to use the tip of my pinky finger to dip, swipe and wipe. This isn't a very satisfying experience but it beats scraping my lips across the top of the plastic rim to the point of chafing my already chapped lips.

You might think an empty tube of lip balm is something to feel sad about. Or bereft, depending on the state of your chapped lips. But not for me.

I am thrilled.

Damn close to deliriously happy.


Because it means

Same goes for an empty container of

This past summer I emptied one. I'm pretty sure it was the first bottle of sunscreen I managed to hang onto the entire summer and not lose it to someone else's beach bag.

Here are a few more things I haven't emptied but look forward to celebrating when I do:

Because it dries up to a petrified crust after the fourth use.

Because I mainly keep this around for my Louisiana native friends.


Because when I change purses, I always manage to leave a few loose pennies, a wadded up tissue, a stick of gum that's dried-stuck to it's foil wrapper, and a stray tube of

This post is dedicated to the real Aunt Bee in my life. Love you Aunt Bee!