Two hours to the test. Will my fetishistic cultish devotion to Edward be challenged by Jacob, or, rather, this latest cinematic update of Jacob, as my kids so fool heartedly believe?
All three of my kids are incredulous that I am solidly in lust with rooted to Team Edward. Surely, they plead, I can see that hairy dark, claw-footed warm-blooded Jacob should win Bella's heart.
But please, I argue, here is the Jacob of Twilight:
Because, I mean, what the hell? What kind of misplaced vamp-mullet is that?
That's right.
Six-pack abs Game on!
Because, I mean, what the hell? What kind of misplaced vamp-mullet is that?
What was director Catherine Hardwicke thinking, putting that Eddie Munster widow's peak on a teenage werewolf? Pretty clear to me whose team she was on.
That's right.
Edward.
Even if she did dress him like a dud.
So the challenge is in place.
Will this latest example of institutionalized sexism in the Hollywood movie industry director do a better job convincing we cougar vampire moms to switch from Team Edward to Team Jacob?
15 comments:
OH DEAR!!!! I might have to actually see this movie....
That last shot makes me feel very, very dirty...and old.
One ticket please!
(Enjoy!)
I haven't read the books, or seen the film, so this is entirely based on the pics you posted here.
I'd go for Jacob.
Every. single. time.
I don't know the answer to this, but did I ever tell you that Jacob was in my daughter's English class last year, and she said he was a goofball with no conversation skills?
Just thought this might help everyone make their decision.
becca -- run, don't walk!
em -- and feeling dirty is a problem because... ?
rachel -- so you like 'em hot and hairy, huh?
jason -- werewolves never were good with words.
I am on team leave this one to the teens--I'm not seeing it in either one of them.
Have fun though!
I haven't even read the books!!!
Is it because I am gay that I don't get the appeal of any of this? Or because I have no teenage daughters maybe?
Are these guys meant to be appealing? Really?????
See! I'm a lost cause. I just can't see it AT ALL!!!
RB -- I read these books because my kids were reading them .. screening ahead to see if it was appropriate for my youngish daughters ... I wouldn't have read the series otherwise.
But since I did, I can say that the author (who is NOT all that good of a writer, in my humble opinion .. she's actually pretty pathetic in many ways, especially her simpering dialog) has stumbled onto a pretty cool plot scheme, one that keeps giving and giving.
The main appeal is the sexual tension .. the vampire-teen can barely contain himself from ravishing the heroine because her blood gives off an unusually powerful intoxicating aroma. And this theme is repeated again, and again, and again. Ye olde romance novel pulp. And the author milks it for all it's worth.
i think I am team edward and my roomie is team jacob... but we both aren't die hard either way
I'm on Team....uhm, Tina Fey?
Jacob almost won me over, but I'm still an Edward girl.
I get to decide Sunday but I feel pretty Team Jacob based on those abs...even if the kid is only 17 (isn't that LEGAL in Texas?????)
Team Edward
every single time..
Jacob has a lovely smile, but I don't go for all the muscles, and besides, he was Shark Boy. I mean, really.
Edward was hawt when he was Cedric Diggory (but he was jailbait then), so I'm sticking with him.
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