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Friday, November 13, 2009

words every mother dreads hearing


And why, every parent who survives the raising of teenagers, deserves an all-expense paid trip to a caribbean island.

No, wait, deserves to be deeded the island. Along with a different cabana boy for every day of the week.

So here is what I heard:

I picked up my son from his after school meeting. He gets into the car.

Mom! You did NOT wear that today!

me: (whose training and work experience means having an answer for everything)

silence.

son: Seriously. MOM! Tell me you did NOT wear that shirt! I mean, look at it! All those swirly colors. And what are those? Are those sequins?!

me: What?!? I like this shirt. The sequins aren't that noticeable ... are they?

son: OMG, Mom. Are you for real? Yes! You can see them. Ughghghghgghghghghg!

me: It adds a little sparkle to my day. So what? And they aren't actually sequins. They are little sparkly bits. And besides, I think the little sparkly bits .... are ... pretty.








33 comments:

Becca said...

my son is still young enough that he tells me I am pretty. i dread him getting older

Mary Alice said...

My heroine, author of the Sweet Potato Queen books, Jill Connor Brown, says “sparkly things will just perk you up make you feel better… more is more… whoever said less is more, is just stupid, it doesn’t make any sense” So there.

phd in yogurtry said...

becca -- it does have it perks. but then there are the pointy jabs that make labor pains feel like a walk in the park.

mary alice -- I like Jill Connor Brown.

Jenn@ You know... that blog? said...

Sometimes it's just so tempting to try to shove 'em back in, isn't it? Well, maybe not.

Your shirt sounds completely groovy, and teens know nothing about fashion anyway - look at where they where their waistlines on their jeans. Gah.

Have a wonderful swirly-sparkly weekend.

Jenn@ You know... that blog? said...

Oh good gawd, I meant "wear" of course. I need to go back on vacation already.

sherry said...

I don't have a son, but I'd have been shocked by this. My daughter once looked at me and said: shirt! But I took it to mean that she liked it. Hmmm...

hokgardner said...

My younger sister, when she was a teen, would try to send my mother in to change clothes before they left the house. Another time, mom was wearing something that my sister deemed "Reba McIntyre-ish." Mom didn't even know whether that was good or bad.

Stacie said...

See? This is what makes you a good mom and me a bad mom. I would have said "OMG! Tell me you didn't wear that superiority complex to school today! Seriously, tell me you didn't!!!"

phd in yogurtry said...

jenn -- very tempting

sherry -- that's one you have the luxury of interpreting for yourself, any way you please. so yes, it was a compliment.

hokgardener -- I know the drill very well. Like when I try to leave the house in my tennis skirt, white socks and black slip on sandals. I do believe they have a point, though.

stacie -- I'm writing this one down.

Lori said...

Ha! What a great story. I'm so glad I just found you. You have a new follower and, it's funny, I was just uttering something about teenagers killing me this past week. :)

Lori
http://whatsafter29.blogspot.com

Mental P Mama said...

He is a lucky boy. That's all I'm sayin'.

snugglebug said...

1. I love coffee yogurt. I was raised on it and it is the reason I drink coffee today. All yummy coffee needs to taste as close to coffee yogurt as possible.
2. I like sparkly shirts, too. Don't like the *man* get you down.

Jenn @ Juggling Life said...

I knew your kids were too young to be saying the words every mother really, really dreads hearing.

That would be, "I'm/My girlfriend is pregnant."

Lisa Wheeler Milton said...

Good thing you love him, right? I bet you looked pretty.

PetalsYoga said...

I am so happy I found you... it's like finding an icy glass of water in the middle of outback Australia. Surprising and refreshing.

Happy Weekend.

She said...

I LIKE IT! I think it's pretty too! Swirls and shiny bits -- how can you go wrong?!!

I love teenagers! They are so honest and fun to be around. I mostly love that I get to send them home at the end of the day! ;-)

bernthis said...

i get a version of that and my kid is 6. It goes something like this:'

I'm talking, she says, "Stoooop Mommy"

fireweedroots said...

Just like "She" I'm happy I get to send them home at the end of the day...
I'll be adding Stacies comment to my arsenal of retorts.

Cheri @ Blog This Mom!® said...

I'm pretty sure that by the time they graduate from college we should be awarded a Purple Heart. Or twenty.

Reluctant Blogger said...

Well, I am impressed that your son noticed that you were wearing something different.

I can't think mine ever would. They might have something to say if I turned up naked I guess but other than that they have never yet commented on anything I wear. They are probably like me and never notice. I never compliment anyone either unless asked because I wouldn't know if it was something they wore every day or if it were new.

But you wear what you like.

imom said...

At least your son notices what you wear! My daughter on the other hand...

I have a similar shirt...

Wendi said...

Oh, that's a scary preview of my future...

Sinda said...

Did he have any positive suggestions for you, any tips? If you're gonna critique, you gotta come back with a tip!

Mary said...

I'm a bit with Jenn@Juggling Life on this.

Thank goodness for a sparkly shirt comment instead!

Jason, as himself said...

Ha! I loved how your font gradually became smaller as your explanation faded shamefully away.

I hear you. I understand. I know honey, I know.

Rachel Cotterill said...

I used to object to my mum's sparkly clothes (especially sequinned shoes). Now, I'm all sparkle :)

blognut said...

Look at the bright side. Now you can threaten to wear it to school events anytime he starts getting out of line.

Kathleen Scott said...

But one of the main jobs of a mother is wear and be and do any damn thing she wants. Otherwise, how will her kids know that life is more than the herd?

Says the woman with three sequin t-shirts.

Logophile said...

You are a very kind mommy.
Not only did you allow him to live after he bagged on your top but you didn't unleash sarcasta-mom on him. I tend to do that myself, and I'm not thinking it's really the BEST way to handle it, but it does discourage future wardrobe critiques from my 13 year old son.

Jocelyn said...

The "silence" answer cracked me up.

I would have pulled over and announced I just remembered three errands I needed to run IN HIS SCHOOL, IN THAT SHIRT.

dkuroiwa said...

thank you to mary alice for the quote from JCB, 'cause that was one of the first things i thought of when reading this!!

The other day, my 7-year-old told me that he'd watch to make sure no one saw me take the trash out....i was in my jammies and he didn't think that was okay. THIS from the child who goes out side naked!

A good friend, with a freshman in college son, told me one time that he goal in life is to embarrass him as much as he did her when he was little. she works really hard at this, much to the joy and laughter of her friends. i love it!
I suggest wearing that shirt to school next time you go...or out to dinner with the family...and sit next to him!!

Petrichor said...

I hate to say it but I side with your son on this one. Sequins or "sparkly bits" are the sign of definite middle-age. My mum never used to wear anything sparkly until one day I came home and she was wearing some very strange top with "sparkly bits". It was disconcerting to say the least.

stephanie (bad mom) said...

He acts like you pranced into the main office and did a dance on the front desk in your swirly sparkly sequined shirt.

You didn't, right?

;)

When my people get all eye-rolly about my outfits, I threaten to do very embarrassing things to them in public, and they believe me...