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Friday, June 12, 2009

exercise in futility

Weight Loss Fact #1

During a routine workout on the eliptical machine I can burn 300 calories in 30 minutes. That's comes to about 10 calories burned per minute.

Weight Loss Fact #2

During a routine sitting in front of my laptop, I can eat four Ghirardelli Truffles in 30 seconds. That comes out to about 600 calories scarfed per minute.

Weight Loss Fact #3



If I want to lose any weight, I'd better stay on the elliptical machine, like, forever.


image source, here

24 comments:

Rach said...

Oh my lord.
I gotta get to the gym RIGHT NOW.

Sara said...

Thanks, You really know how to depress a girl.....

Melissa said...

Totally sucks, doesn't it?

Helena said...

Excuse my ignorance but what on earth is an eliptical machine???

Jenn @ Juggling Life said...

Or, perish the thought, off the laptop forever.

Reluctant Blogger said...

OH I feel so saintly now - I don't eat at the laptop. I love it too much to risk dropping crumbs on it. I do drink wine though. Silly logic as wine would do far more harm, wouldn't it?

So I would lose weight but get very drunk if I stayed at my laptop.

I once went running with a mars bar in my hand - scoffing calories as I tried to run them off. Made me feel very ill actually.

Margo said...

I hear you! It's just so WRONG. We should be able to eat anything we want if we even look at an elliptical.

Reinvent Dad said...

I have such a chip on my shoulder after I work out at the gym....I feel like I can eat anything. Wrong Wrong Wrong!

Oh, and I'm an elliptical user as well...can't do the treadmill as I can't even walk straight..let alone jog or run.

katydidnot said...

oh, i think you need to check your math. can that be right? that can't be right. can it?

Anna Lefler said...

See? We actually DO use math later in real life.

Any math teachers out there? This is the perfect example to throw at those slacker students!

Have an elliptical weekend...

:-D Anna

Fragrant Liar said...

Weightloss Fact #4: It just gets worse as the years go by.

flutter said...

word.

Mental P Mama said...

gah

Jason, as himself said...

That is so discouraging.

Why don't you just munch lettuce in front of the computer instead?

Only kidding.

The eliptical is so boring.

AnnD said...

Forever...that would be awful! I have replaced much of my chocolate cravings with chocolate soy milk (the Silk brand is the best) and that usually nips them right in the bud. Usually...

blognut said...

God knows I hate that freakin' eliptical machine. AAARRRGGGHHH!!!

katydidnot said...

i've been experimenting with how quickly i can eat these truffles. except i've been using m+ms as stand ins for truffles.

apathy lounge said...

Or learn to use your laptop WHILE on the elliptical.

Jenn @ youknow... that blog? said...

I'd sure like to know how you got a statue of me...!

As it's hard to type with my hands over my eyes so I can't read the truth in your words, I guess I'll just do a comment instead.

How would you feel about being creative and helping me out?! Seems only fair since you put my statue on your blog ;) I need a name for a new quartet I'm breaking ground on this week. I've turned it into a contest on my blog:

http://youknowthatblog.com/?p=155

I would love your input!

Dr. Deb said...

I'm with you on that!!!

Real Live Lesbian said...

LMAO....I need an eliptical implant for my legs!

Jocelyn said...

One of my greatest delights as a reader has always been when I encounter writing that sums up my own life experience better than I could, myself.

Congratulations for being that person today.

Signed,
The Woman Who Did An Hour of Cardio and Lifted Weights and Then Ate 140 Jelly Bellies

Agent X said...

I joined the TEAM weightloss at Lifetime Fitness and lost 20.8 lbs in 12 weeks through the program. They teach you nutrition and the way to exercise so you are burning fat...I really recommend it if you are serious about losing weight. It works great

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